Setbacks

Stumbling over the border
Of clarity and illusion
Senseless emotions and thoughts
Pushing, pushing, dying to explode.
Fear
Of what I don't know and of what I do
Of stagnancy, of no fucking change
Of no control
Of too much time
Or not enough
Of everyone else
And everything.
Of my head, my body, my soul
Do I even have those things

Silence and emptiness and fucking fear
Breathing down my fucking neck
Teasing, taunting, confusing.
What the fuck is real
How am I supposed to know